Understanding Imposter Syndrome
“Impostor syndrome thrives in the petri dish of secrecy.” — Brene Brown.
Have you ever achieved something remarkable only to dismiss the credit you deserve immediately? Maybe you told yourself, “I just got lucky,” or “They’ll find out I’m not good enough.” If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Studies show that 70% of high achievers experience imposter syndrome, a persistent feeling of inadequacy despite their accomplishments. Fueled by the constant barrage of self-criticism prevalent in our modern world, this inner critic can significantly hinder your confidence and hold you back from reaching your full potential. However, this article will provide powerful tools to overcome imposter syndrome and unlock the confidence you deserve in this age of self-doubt.
Let’s examine the common signs and characteristics of imposter syndrome:
- Feeling like a fraud despite your accomplishments.
- Attributing success to external factors like luck.
- Discounting positive feedback and focusing on negative critiques.
- Fear of exposure and being unmasked as “not good enough.”
So, what are the origins of imposter syndrome? They can include:
- Perfectionism is a personality trait characterized by setting excessively high standards for oneself and being overly critical of one’s performance.
- Comparison trap: here, the individual compares themselves to others, believing they are not worthy because they fall short of meeting other people’s standards.
- Fear of failure: the fear of failure holds many people back, and it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. The person will use their past failures as an indication of forthcoming failure.
- Internalized negative messages: refers to beliefs or perceptions that an individual adopts about themselves based on critical remarks received from others or societal influences.
Strategies For Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
“Don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.” — Jon Acuff.
What are ways to overcome imposter syndrome? Firstly, we can learn to reframe negative self-talk into more empowering thoughts. Many techniques can help to shift negative self-talk, such as ACT, CBT, IFS Therapy, etc. These psychology-based therapies shine the spotlight on one’s negative thoughts. Moreover, they allow the individual to change negative thinking into positive and self-empowering thoughts. Secondly, we can take an evidence-based approach to overcome imposter syndrome. This might involve gathering evidence of your skills and achievements to counter self-doubt. This consists of keeping a journal and listing your achievements to counter self-doubt. It needn’t involve grand accomplishments but may include minor victories where you overcame a difficulty or obstacle. One method I use to help clients reframe limiting beliefs is The Work by Byron Katie, which I have referred to in previous articles. It is a powerful technique based on four self-inquiry questions to help you overcome limiting beliefs.
Overcoming imposter syndrome can be achieved by viewing challenges as learning and skill development opportunities. Accepting failure and viewing mistakes and setbacks as valuable learning opportunities is essential. Successful people fail more times than they succeed. The difference is they keep going despite their failures because they are focused on the outcome rather than the failure itself. It was the basketball great Michael Jordan who said: “I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Secondly, adopt a Growth Mindset, as espoused by Stanford professor of psychology Carol Dweck. She suggests that we shift from a Fixed Mindset that believes: “I am not good enough” to a Growth Mindset that believes: “I can learn and improve.” The former mindset is focused on failure, whereas the Growth Mindset believes in continual improvement, growth, and learning.
Similarly, we can learn to focus on our strengths instead of our weaknesses to overcome imposter syndrome. If we focus on our shortcomings, we believe we are a failure and that nothing we do is good enough. If we can identify and acknowledge our strengths and talents, we can harness them in beneficial ways to grow and develop. Equally, we can leverage our strengths to build confidence through our endeavors. For instance, while acknowledging your weaknesses is essential, channeling your energy into developing your strengths is crucial. Focusing on your strengths builds confidence and allows you to persevere when faced with challenges. What we focus on becomes the focal point upon which our success or failure is decided. I’m advocating being mindful of your weaknesses without giving them much attention. Instead, develop and build upon your strengths. Is this a practice you are willing to focus on? Instead of dwelling on your weaknesses, consider how your strengths can be used to conquer imposter syndrome and unlock your true confidence.
Cultivating Confidence And Self-Compassion
“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving yourself and see what happens.” — Louise L. Hay.
Considering this, how can we build confidence in this age of self-criticism? Firstly, we can practice self-compassion, which is paramount to building self-trust. Self-compassion means treating yourself with kindness and understanding instead of self-criticism. For example, you may have spoken harshly to yourself to get through difficult times over the years. However, research studies by Kristin Neff have shown that self-criticism and negative self-talk limit our success because they reduce motivation, hinder growth and learning, and lead to an increase in anxiety and self-consciousness. Her research has shown that empowering self-talk and self-compassion helps us overcome setbacks and motivate us to achieve our goals and highest aspirations. Similarly, self-compassion means cultivating self-care practices, which foster emotional well-being and reduce self-doubt. What self-care methods do you engage in daily? Does it involve having a warm shower, eating your favorite meal, reading your favorite book, or watching your beloved Netflix show? Don’t discount the minor self-care acts, which can potentially enhance your mental and personal well-being.
Equally, it’s important to celebrate our progress and acknowledge our minor achievements, which build a sense of accomplishment. We discount the effort to achieve victory if we overlook minor successes. This enhances our self-confidence and motivation to overcome more considerable challenges. Likewise, practicing gratitude can build confidence by focusing on what we are thankful for, including our capabilities. I’m grateful for my ability to listen intently to others and uncover the deeper meaning behind people’s words. This allows me to connect with them and offer genuine support and understanding. Therefore, don’t discount your capabilities because they may be valuable strengths. Lastly, seeking help by building a network of individuals who believe in you and encourage your personal growth is paramount. If we surround ourselves with people who believe in us, we will likely believe in ourselves. You might consider gaining professional help from a therapist if self-doubt significantly impacts your life. Having a network of people you trust and value goes a long way to building self-confidence and helping you conquer imposter syndrome.
Remember the anecdote we began with? That feeling of dismissing your achievements? You’re not alone. But the good news is, you don’t have to be a prisoner of your inner critic. This article has equipped you with tools to combat imposter syndrome and unlock your true confidence. Now, it’s your turn to take action. Start by identifying and challenging your negative self-talk. Reframe your perspective, acknowledge your strengths, and celebrate your progress, no matter how small. Surround yourself with supportive people and cultivate self-compassion. Remember, you are capable, worthy, and deserving of success. Take these tools and step boldly into the future, leaving imposter syndrome behind. You’ve got this!
Are You Ready to Transform Your Life with Confidence?
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Tony Fahkry
Expert Life Coach
