Growth And Expansion
“All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” — Walt Disney
Motivational speaker and author Steve Maraboli wrote in Unapologetically You: “I am so grateful for my troubles. As I reflect back on my life, I have come to realize that my greatest triumphs have been born of my greatest troubles.” Problems have plagued mankind since he first roamed the earth 200,000 years ago. Back then, the environment was unforgiving and the uncertainty of the future meant life expectancy was low. We’ve evolved significantly since that time, with humankind adapting to ever-increasing global changes.
Closer to home, worries are apparent in our everyday lives ranging from: health, financial troubles, relationships, family, and career to name a few. When confronted with difficulties, there’s a tendency to believe they are greater than our capacity to overcome them. Yet once the dust has settled, our troubles are seen from a different perspective. As much as we might think we are mired in them, problems exist to cultivate our own personal development. Growth and expansion are fundamental to life, and without them we stay stagnant. Life creates itself anew within each moment. In order for it to expand, it must experience chaos to give birth to new beginnings. How do you feel about this? Do you believe that you have the capacity to deal with your problems or sometimes they may seem greater than you?
Challenges Are Clothed As Pain And Suffering
“The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles.” — Bernard Baruch
Whilst I appreciate it is difficult to see a way out, a solution is less likely to appear when we’re consumed by the problem. We might want to consider an alternative perspective from those we trust to help us contemplate our troubles in a new light. It was Albert Einstein who once said: “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” We must develop a new awareness to perceive our problems by stepping back from the drama and disassociating ourselves emotionally. I am working with a client at present who is experiencing significant physical challenges in the form of an injury causing her physical, mental and emotional anguish. She feels powerless to understand how the injury is an opportunity to learn and grow because she is consumed by the pain.
However, from a teaching perspective, she is someone who is self-critical. The injury is inviting her to treat herself with compassion and kindness, since physical wounds force us to nurse our pain – hence the need for self-compassion. Until she does, her mental and emotional pain will get the better of her, forcing her to feel trapped and exhausted by the suffering. She will embody the lesson at a deeper level once she experiences a shift in her awareness since it is likely to be a foreign concept to her for now. Life presents us with difficulties and challenges clothed as pain and suffering, so we may overcome them and gain the wisdom along with it. We are not presented with an experience we cannot rise above. Granted it may appear that way at the time and it is because we are focused on the problem, not the solution. Is this is an idea you are willing to embrace and put to practice in your life? There’s only one way to find out!
Change Your Perspective
“When you start in life, if you find you are wrongly placed, don’t hesitate to change, but don’t change because troubles come up and difficulties arise. You must meet and overcome and conquer them. And in meeting and overcoming and conquering them, you will make yourself stronger for the future.” — Charles M. Schwab
It was the poet Rumi who said centuries ago: “Welcome difficulty. Learn the alchemy True Human Beings know: the moment you accept what troubles you’ve been given, a door opens.” It is understood, if we are driving a motor vehicle and its skids out of control, focussing our attention on avoiding a solid object (problem) means our focal point is fixed on what we don’t want to happen. However, if we fix our attention on correcting the steering (solution), it is likely we will avoid an accident altogether. As the adage goes: Energy flows where attention goes. Regrettably, if we conceive our troubles to be greater than they are, we are likely to be consumed by the problem and unable to overcome it. I’m not suggesting it is easy and it may take years, if not decades for a person to change their outlook. It is well worth it, though, otherwise the same problems will reappear, arranged differently. “If you see ten troubles coming down the road, you can be sure that nine will run into the ditch before they reach you,” declared the 30th President of the United States Calvin Coolidge.
If the only question we ask when we experience difficulties is: “What can I possibly learn from this situation?” we will have attuned our attention to a solution. Our troubles are not as imposing as we think, it is our thoughts weighing heavily on our consciousness that dominates us. If we change our perspective, it will dissolve and a solution will emerge. Countless individuals have overcome trouble and adversity and used it to prevail. No doubt they were consumed by the suffering, yet they rose above their predicament. Mankind is resilient in moments of despair where he comes to realise his true character. What is troubling you right now? How can you overcome it? What is the struggle inviting you to learn about yourself? Who will you become when you conquer it? How will you see the world differently? These are questions to ask yourself if you want to shift from victim to victor.
Awaken Your Greatest Self
“Every problem is a gift – without problems we would not grow.” – Anthony Robbins
You can overcome your troubles and turn them into triumph if you look for the lessons buried within your challenges. Don’t let the problem be bigger than you, since you have the wisdom to surmount your difficulties, even if it doesn’t look that way. If you must, reflect upon earlier times when you overcame previous challenges. You have what it takes to win through and you will know this when you are tested most. A boxer becomes a better fighter in the ring facing his opponent. No amount of training can prepare him for what he is likely to encounter on fight day. Adopt the attitude of a boxer and lean into your troubles and you will prevail. What happens to an individual who does not experience setbacks and problems? They develop a weak spirit devoid of courage, will and perseverance.
Therefore, let your problems lead you and awaken your greatest self; the warrior being that knows how to surmount any problem life presents you with. The late American author and poet Ella Wheeler Wilcox knew of the value of difficulties when she wrote: “No difficulty can discourage, no obstacle dismay, no trouble dishearten the man who has acquired the art of being alive. Difficulties are but dares of fate, obstacles but hurdles to try his skill, troubles but bitter tonics to give him strength; and he rises higher and looms greater after each encounter with adversity.” We must stop fighting and resisting our difficulties, believing they are bigger than us. It is this belief that keeps us stuck in our predicament. We ought to explore them, lean into them and face them with resiliency, knowing the right attitude will help us to rise above them. Only then will the doorway of discomfort open to reveal the path to our greatest triumph.
Are You Ready to Transform Your Life with Confidence?
Are you ready to transform your life and unlock your potential? Start your journey with me today! My Life Coaching Program has empowered many to achieve lasting change. Schedule your FREE 30-minute consultation now and take the first step towards a brighter, more confident you.
Tony Fahkry
Expert Life Coach
