Your Worthiness Is Already Given To You
“You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” — Brené Brown
Worthiness is a measure of what we’re willing to receive. At the deepest level, self-worth relates to our sense of entitlement and involves embracing our true self, whose essence is pure love. We are already worthy, since our thoughts related to our self-worth do not make up who we really are. These are invented storylines that don’t show who we are beneath the surface. They’re made-up narratives, gained from well-intentioned people, and were never ours to begin with. I appreciate, it may be difficult to comprehend, yet with focussed attention you’ll realise your unworthiness is an script not worthy of consideration. To claim our worthiness, we must acknowledge our faults and insecurities, while knowing these are one facet of our being.
Our worthiness is a call to honour our entire self and not focus on the disempowering aspects. For example, I recall working in an upmarket men’s shoe store, as a young adult and discovering the imperfections in leather shoes. Customers flocked to buy shoes with slight flaws, attributed to the animals grazing against wire fences or trees. This exhibited the hide’s true character, replete with natural blemishes. Equally, our scars and imperfections are not something to cower from, yet embrace as the wholeness of our being. Brazilian author Paulo Coelho captures this sentiment: “Take pride in your scars, they speak more loudly than the sword that caused them.” No one is perfect, not even the most enlightened being. Our earthly way of life gives rise to growing into the person we wish to become. This means our insecurities and negative attributes have the potential to be transformed into endowing characteristics.
Low self-worth is evident in others when they’re paid a compliment. Some will offer thanks while others dismiss it because they’re unable to receive praise. This insignificant gesture communicates the individual’s capacity to receive. Our ability to receive and give love determines our self-worth. If we’re unaccustomed to receive abundance, whether as compliments, love, compassion, kindness or otherwise, we limit our ability to enhance our self-worth. Beyond achieving our dreams or attaining success, our greatest triumph arises when we embrace our worthiness. Our genetic expression, talents, and gifts are the highest forms of abundance. It rests on us whether we embrace these gifts and use them rightfully. Can you see that because of your existence, your worthiness is an attribute already given to you? Your task is merely to remove the thoughts that impede its realisation.
Embrace Every Facet Of Your Being
“The most splendid achievement of all is the constant striving to surpass yourself and to be worthy of your own approval.” — Denis Waitley
In the same way, we enrich our self-worth by acknowledging our worthiness to receive. We must upgrade our thoughts; similar to updating computer software, so it runs efficiently without a virus. Whilst I appreciate the computer analogy is a simple metaphor, it highlights when we let go of undesirable beliefs; we create a fulfilling life devoid of stories that no longer serve us. To accept our worthiness, we must let go of playing the victim and forgive ourselves and others. Every experience, whether good or bad, has brought you to this point in time, so even the words on this screen are orchestrated to guide your personal transformation. You needn’t accumulate more thoughts to validate your self-worth. Instead, let go of who you think you are and allow your authentic self to be known. For change to occur, we must accept our current circumstances without conditions.
Consider a car restorer who buys a dilapidated vehicle to refurbish. His thoughts are on the car’s final transformation, rather than its current condition. See if you can adopt the same thinking and accept every facet of your life with conviction. I’m not asking you to take pleasure in your current circumstances, however accept your reality as it is now. Everyone is worthy of love because the conditions that contribute to our conception were conceived out of love. Until a certain age, we rarely question our self-worth. However, with the passage of time, we take on other people’s opinions and make them our own. To own our worthiness, we must make it a priority to embrace every facet of our being. We avoid focussing on our negative qualities, yet appreciate they are a developing facet of our being. There’ll come a time when we’ll look back and see how pointless it was to focus on our negative characteristics.
I often overhear people declare how they’ll feel worthy once they have, “Insert thing, person or way of life.” We’ll never be worthy, even with a surplus of money or love, if we carry our unworthiness around like a handbag. Unworthiness is a virus that infects our spirit and stifles our potential. We must remove the virus and see it as an obscuring veil of deceit that robs us of our authenticity. Therefore, as an exercise, write in your journal how you can claim your worthiness. It may be as simple as positive self-talk when you make a mistake. It might mean saying “thank you, I appreciate it” when someone offers you a compliment. Make it a practice to focus on nurturing your self-worth, as you would someone you love and care about. After all, beneath all the suffering you’ve ever experienced, you are worthy because you are already enough by your presence alone.
Are You Ready to Transform Your Life with Confidence?
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Tony Fahkry
Expert Life Coach
